Local cake aficionados must know about Chelsea’s Cup and Cake. I have heard of it and since then, I wanted to pay a visit to dramatically increase my calorie intake while not regretting anything. But here is the thing: I have an issue. Any place where I may get parking problems is out of bounds for me. I pretend it does not exist and that’s about it.
It should come as no surprise that I was delighted when Chelsea’s partnered with Intermart to sell cakes. Suddenly, being part of the exclusive club of Chelsea’s cake eaters was something accessible, and I did not wait long before getting one. I had the choice between Red Velvet, Carrot Cake and Butterscotch Cake. I went for the Butterscotch because it was comparatively fresher, and it looked quite tempting. The icing looked generous, and it was topped with a caramel beurre salé type preparation. At 675 MUR, it was not cheap. But hey, it was Chelsea’s. The weight was also pretty hefty. It felt massive, which made me happy. More mass means more cake, which means more goodies, right? Well, sort of. I think. Maybe.
I am still conflicted about this cake. I gave it two days, thinking that my first try must have been off because I was tasting it wrong. I mean, it’s the sort of cake that makes you second-guess yourself. Perhaps I used too much mouthwash on that day? Or my tastebuds decided not to cooperate. Yet, I was disappointed. So very disappointed.
Where do I start? Once I got past the sophisticated looks of it, I was met with resistance. Literally. I used my Giesser Santoku knife to cut a slice but the force that was required to get past the icing layer was phenomenal. The knife marks can be seen on the base in the pictures below. This indicated two things: the cake itself was very dense, and the fat content of the filling was relatively high to have congealed in this manner. Things did not feel good. Then, when the cake revealed its insides, I was surprised to see a dense chocolate cake base. I was not expecting chocolate (or more accurately, dark cocoa ) cake for a butterscotch-themed confectionery. Not only did this not tally with what I thought a butterscotch cake was, but I profoundly dislike chocolate/cocoa cake. My old friend Google confirmed my apprehensions. And then, the filling. A thick chocolatey looking ganache-icing thing was sandwiched between cake layers. And the middle was some sort of solidified caramel filling, which I suppose was the ‘butterscotch’ part. Sure enough, it liquefied at room temperature. I was not very impressed by what I was seeing. It wanted to emulate American decadence but looked like a gooey mess.
The eating experience, though, was shocking, in the most unpleasant way. The sweetness and sheer disequilibrium of the whole cake was painful. The icing had an impossible amount of sugar, and it was painfully (yes I used pain twice in the space of two sentences) obvious on the palate. It had no particular taste; just tastebud-paralysing amounts of sugar and fat that was used to hold it together. It had to be the most terrible icing I had ever tasted on a cake. But that was not even the worst part. The amount of caramel, which, needless to say, is very sweet, combined with the hard, sugar filled imposture of a filling worsened what was already a bad experience. This felt and tasted wrong. It was borderline inedible. Even the cake base was too sweet, which is absurd. The weight of the cake was down to one component: sugar, closely followed by fat. How could you do this to me Chelsea’s? Even the sparse shaved almonds on the outside of the cake did not help. It was awful, and overkill on sweetness.
Of course, one bad cake does not mean that Chelsea’s is bad. Perhaps I just stumbled on an exceptionally bad one. But there are a few questions to be asked. Are the supermarket cakes fundamentally different to that of the cafe? Are they made to lower standards due to ‘mass production’? Has quality been compromised to cater for a wider consumer base? Whatever the reason(s), this was a poor, poor cake. One of the worst I have eaten, despite trying to convince myself otherwise. Will I buy another cake from the supermarket? No. Will I try the coffee shop? Maybe.. *cough* parking *cough*.
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